satire on sports...to be continued

Every sport is pretty much a metaphor for the male life, condensed into 4 quarters. Basketball, golf, soccer, football, hockey. It’s all about getting that ball into the hole. I think that’s why most women, myself included are just completely apathetic about sports, not because we’re not athletically capable, just because we can’t relate to that drive that men have when it comes to a game that’s all about getting pussy, figuratively speaking. Now if there was a sport geared toward women, say they were all goalies, then I can see women joining local teams in swarms. It’d be a team of guys against one girl goalie. Their target is to get their ball in the net while the goalie’s objective is to block them, but not before engaging in a five minute discussion about ethics with the player trying to score to get a feel for what kind of person he is. The goalie wins when she lets the guy whose astrological sign is most compatible with hers to get his ball in, while the male team wins if she is sitting on the sidelines reading Nicholas Sparks and smoking a cigarette.